Labouring and giving birth was an incredible rite of passage. I did my best to prepare for it, but nothing can prepare you. (Although every bit of preparation I did was valuable.) I have a newfound respect for every person who has gone through this experience, regardless of the details. I have a new appreciation for how little control one has, in many ways, over one's birth experience, and how much variation there is - every labour, and every birth, is different. It boggles my mind that every human who has ever existed on this planet was brought into the world through some experience similar to this; some pregnant person labouring, enduring, and somehow successfully birthing a baby.
We're bipeds with enormous brains. Given the relative size of our skull and pelvis, it seems to me that human labour and childbirth is about as difficult as it could possibly be and still happen at all. Having experienced it for myself, it's no wonder that maternal mortality rates have historically been so high, and still are in so many parts of the world - under different circumstances I would probably have died myself. Nonetheless, each of us is the result of an unbroken chain of our ancestors successfully giving birth, mostly without pain relief or medical care, going back a million years. It beggars belief.
I'm beyond grateful to the NHS, especially the Royal Free trust, the Edgeware home birth team for respecting my wishes and my birth plan so comprehensively, and Barnet hospital for giving me top-notch medical care that had me home within 48 hours after I needed to transfer. I'm ridiculously appreciative of my love Leo Dawn for being the best birth partner a person could hope for, for sticking with me every step of the way, providing unflinching emotional and physical support, and sharing the experience as completely as a non-uterus-owner could. I'm incredibly grateful to our doula Shiri Shalmy for her calm, generous, kind, competent, consistent support, for doing a 30 hour shift without sleep or a proper meal, for her strong arms and hands, her patience and bottomless faith in my ability to endure. Thank you Shiri for working tirelessly to support us, and to create a calm, organised environment for the birth. If you're in London and looking for a birth partner, I wholeheartedly recommend her.
Finally, huge thanks to Danielle Kalinovskis for the beautiful photos of my time labouring at home - and for the endless cups of tea, for feeding the cat and for the wonderful gift of tidying up at 5am so we came home to a clean house after the birth. Your photos made me cry when I first saw them and are a profoundly moving memento of one of the most powerful experiences of my life.
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Addendum, cross-posted from Facebook
Date: 2019-07-19 09:20 pm (UTC)We're bipeds with enormous brains. Given the relative size of our skull and pelvis, it seems to me that human labour and childbirth is about as difficult as it could possibly be and still happen at all. Having experienced it for myself, it's no wonder that maternal mortality rates have historically been so high, and still are in so many parts of the world - under different circumstances I would probably have died myself. Nonetheless, each of us is the result of an unbroken chain of our ancestors successfully giving birth, mostly without pain relief or medical care, going back a million years. It beggars belief.
I'm beyond grateful to the NHS, especially the Royal Free trust, the Edgeware home birth team for respecting my wishes and my birth plan so comprehensively, and Barnet hospital for giving me top-notch medical care that had me home within 48 hours after I needed to transfer. I'm ridiculously appreciative of my love Leo Dawn for being the best birth partner a person could hope for, for sticking with me every step of the way, providing unflinching emotional and physical support, and sharing the experience as completely as a non-uterus-owner could. I'm incredibly grateful to our doula Shiri Shalmy for her calm, generous, kind, competent, consistent support, for doing a 30 hour shift without sleep or a proper meal, for her strong arms and hands, her patience and bottomless faith in my ability to endure. Thank you Shiri for working tirelessly to support us, and to create a calm, organised environment for the birth. If you're in London and looking for a birth partner, I wholeheartedly recommend her.
Finally, huge thanks to Danielle Kalinovskis for the beautiful photos of my time labouring at home - and for the endless cups of tea, for feeding the cat and for the wonderful gift of tidying up at 5am so we came home to a clean house after the birth. Your photos made me cry when I first saw them and are a profoundly moving memento of one of the most powerful experiences of my life.
♥